Today was my friend Gretchen's birthday. June 25th, today was the day Michael Jackson dies, one year ago. And to be fair, I didn't know it was Gretchen's birthday until Carrie posted it on Facebook, so thank you for doing that, for giving that honor to her. Because her memory needed to be honored today. She was a wonderful woman who touched so many lives in so many ways. Her life was taken too soon. And we don't know God's plan for us, that is why we are human, and He is Divine. When she passed away in January, I struggled, I felt my life fall into pieces because I never had a friend pass away in my adult life. It was completely unexpected. You can't prepare for that phone call, for that feeling of your breathe being taken away. The loss of feeling in your knees, and the shortness of breathe in your chest... and in my life the only other time I have encountered this feeling was when my grandmother passed away. I never wanted this feeling again. I thought I could handle anything at this point. I've been through it. My grandmother., my friend. I'm done. I've gotten those two shocking phone calls. But then today came....
Jeanne Dilascio was THE GODMOTHER of New York. From as far back into my childhood as I can remember, when she spoke, you listened, but in the kindest, most gentlest of hearts. She was wise. She was giving, she would and did, give you the shirt off her back if it meant it kept you warm and dry, and ultimately, it was what laid her to rest. She took care of everyone first and herself last. She always put herself last, because she made sure everyone else was doing the best first. But it came at a price, you had to fend for yourself from that point. You had to take care of yourself in return. You had to survive. It was your payback. It was your reward. It was how you repaid her! You became a survivor! She taught self discipline, nurture, and strength. She taught you how to laugh at any situation, but be tough when necessary. She taught me so many things...
There are so many memories I have of her in so many different roles she played throughout her life. The caring cousin, The wonderful fun grandmother, the stern boss (the couple of times I got to see her at work) but from what I understand, she was fair, and she was hardworking, and she was respected! Because she cared about people. Again, putting her needs above her own. It wasn't until I got older that I actually got a chance to sit and talk to her, and I remember thinking how I finally "Earned" my chance to sit with her! I was so excited. I was going to prove to her, I was worth her time. I wasn't like the rest of my family, filled with all the "drama", I had substance! But she saw right through me, she knew I had just as much drama as the rest of 'em! And come to find out, she liked the "drama" in my family! But only in doses! And come to find out, she had "drama" in her family too!
When my grandmother had passed away we would sit for hours and "sneak and smoke some cigarettes." For hours we would have heart to heart conversations that to this day I will cherish to my grave. I feel it brought us as close as two people can get during a hardship. She was the one that really saw me through the most difficult time in my life. And she never judged me the night I got plastered...... 1 litre of Riesling in 1 hour, by myself... there was no drunkenness...it was straight to the pass out stage.... and my mom was FURIOUS!!!! So was my Uncle who bought the bottle for his wife, but, hey, I just lost my grandmother, my grandfather was a couple of days behind, I was in serious need of help.... and Jeanne just smoothed things over very quickly by covering me up with a blanket an said "give the girl a break"..... although the next morning she advised no more wine the rest of the week, and I adhered! I was happy she had my back!
She had this thick New York accent, and after she and her niece Anita watched my son for almost three weeks that whole summer, Landon for almost a Year had a HUGE New York accent! It was hilarious! Anyway, I don''t know what I am going to do in Ohio now without you Jeanne. We enjoyed coming to see you! And your two houses... LOL! And walking into church late...and disturbing the peace at all the tiny business in your nifty little town... You touched lives wherever you were, wherever you lived. You touched my life, my children's life, your grandchildren will be feeling your loss the most, I have no doubt, and for that, I can't even begin to comprehend their pain. You are a women that was loved by so many people for so many different reasons. And I am for certain that God has a plan for you in Heaven, But know your plan on earth was known. and it was conquered! Thank you for your love, for wisdom. and for your support through all the years. Today was not an easy day to let you go, but it was a good day for you to be remembered!
