I ran twice today. I haven't run this much in almost a year, since I was training to go to France, which is really a joke because I was only training to run 5 miles with my dear friend just to keep her company. I wussed out on her 15 mile run because on our 5 mile run... by mile 3 my knee gave out, I sort of jogged the rest of the way, and the next day, by the time we got to Paris I was limping so bad, I was in so much pain, the thought of even climbing the Eiffel tower frightened me. But I was at my thinnest this time last year, and it's because I was on a strict protocol of diet and exercise. This year, I promise myself that I am doing this for me. So, I have spent the last two weeks in a rut, feeling sorry for myself, and now it's time to move on, accept change and embrace the good I am doing for my mind, body, soul and most importantly, health....
OK....
So after the summer was so crazy last year 2010:
July: Trips to New York, New Jersey, California, Florida (The Boy's FIRST DISNEY Trip), Ohio...and yes, this was ALL in one month....
August: Started school, Zachary celebrated his 2nd birthday, my nephew celebrated his 5th birthday, Saw Michelle (my oldest and dearest friend) in Kansas City (I think it was this month...I'm so confused on the time frame)
September: Still in school, baseball games, Tulsa, Kansas City again, 2 of my nieces birthday's (ONE TURNED 15!!!!!), kind of a blah month other then that....
October....pretty crazy: We had our Charity auction for school, Mike's birthday, I quite my job, Landon changed schools, Zachary is now at home with me, we went to Dallas, I auditioned for a National commercial for "Cotton", I joined that choir at church, I joined the BV Players community theatre group
November: Started rewriting the Christmas play for BV Players, started rehearsals for Christmas show, another of my nieces birthday, Thanksgiving, decorated the house for Christmas, Folks came to visit, went on the Polar Express for Christmas season, Debuted my vocal talent at church for Talent showcase, sang a solo at mass for the first time, began rehearsals for Christmas midnight mass, began rehearsals for my solo piece for midnight Christmas mass, play dates for Landon, The Little Gym for Zachary
December: Mom's birthday, "The Selfish Elf", Date night with the neighbors, Date night with the hubby, Mike's Christmas party, Car breaks down, Landon's Birthday Party, Landon's Christmas program at school, Zachary's final performance at "the Little Gym" before winter break, (He loves to hang like a monkey...), start the car shopping experience, Christmas, Setting up "Santa", Midnight Mass", Solo...Success..., Christmas...FANTASTIC!....Trip to Ohio....FUN!, Ice Skating, Shopping, Zoo, Birthday's, My niece's Birthday, Landon's Birthday, Church, getting lost in the GHETTO!!!!!!, Spending time with the family, actually enjoying the time with the family....., getting my hair done, Mike went to Detroit, took care of the MI house, sent out Christmas cards, celebrated the New year, came home.
JANUARY: Looking for new car!
Looking for New job!
Looking for new body!
Looking for new peace of mind!
It's been a year since my dear friend Gretchen past away, on that same day, I found out a very dear friend of mine lost her mother. In the last two years I dealt with so much loss I can't even conceive the possibility of having it come close to me as losing a parent, although each loss was as great in my heart as if it were a sibling or closer. Esp, the case with Jeannie, this death was so sudden and so heart breaking, I felt I lost my grandmother all over again, and as devastating as this was, I can't imagine the pain my friend must be enduring as these are one notch removed from the mother that bore you in the womb.
My heart goes out to those that have lost a parent, I can't even conceive the loss, or the pain. I can only hope the ease and comfort comes with knowing that what they are doing in heaven with God is great, and we will one day soon know that greatness. It's our reward. Our riches, for the pain we might have had to endure here on earth.
With that said, take each day as a gift, never take it for granted, and always take it as an opportunity to live it as you see fit according to your dream. The way I see it, Each day we live is a a day closer to our death, and the more time we waste is the more time we have to answer to God for why we didn't work on perfecting the talent's and gifts He gave us. I mean really, it's all in our hands, we just have to figure out how it was meant to be used, and for what purpose.
My heart is breaking for a certain someone and their family right now, and they know who they are, and all my love, and prayers and thoughts are with them. Mike and I love you so much!
ok..
I have spent the better part of my time since I left my job trying to figure out what I want to do with my time and ironically these opportunities keep falling into my lap. Directing jobs, paying jobs, volunteers jobs, jobs that land me in the newspaper....
And the bottom line, is that each job has finally fulfilled me, I haven't found fault, or ill-contempt with each position as I normally do, I am actually happy to be doing the things I have been granted, however small or tedious the task. For I see, that they have been given to me as a gift, and I am embracing them.....
I don't have a New Years resolution, but I do see a pattern emerging already, to accept the things that can not change, to embrace the things that are given to me, and the wisdom to the know the difference!
Welcome 20-11, the 11th year of 2000. 2-11...I accept the change you bring, the year of a new decade, the year of a new me...
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